Never Better

Never Better Keith is a recovering alcoholic whose life is in a mess. He is self-centred but has a family and a job. He has started going to Alcoholics’ Anonymous to help him on the way to sobriety. Sounds like the most depressing kitchen sink drama but is instead the situation in BBC 2’s Thursday night comedy, Never Better, starring Stephen Mangan of Green Wing, Jane Hall and Adrian Mole: The Cappuccino Years.

Mangan seems to enjoy playing dysfunctional losers but this time his character is seemingly more unpleasant than even Dr Guy Secretan from the Green Wing. Keith mocks everything and cannot take the AA meetings seriously, often ridiculing to the point that they descend into farce. The twelve steps that they use to recovery are a particular focus for his ire.

This week he is on step three which is about Faith, whereupon he ridicules religion and claims that it cannot apply to him, as he does not believe in God. Another member of the group, Marianne, is very religious and is very offended by his attitude. It does not help that she is quite attractive and Keith cannot keep his eyes of her bust. She is also a cat lover and takes solace in her cat, Chairman Miaow, thus receiving more ridicule from Keith.

Keith is encouraged to show faith in humanity instead and help others in order to help instead. When Chairman Miaow needs to go to the vet’s he needs to be taken aside to help Marianne take him there. Her obsession with telling him a religious poem means that they miss the appointment and prompts Marianne to go off the rails in a fit of swearing in a drink binge as she is convinced the cat is dying. Keith notices Chairman Miaow coughing and out pops a furball. Marianne falls asleep in a stupor and believes that Chairman Miaow has been cured by her faith. Keith keeps quiet showing a good side to him that he keeps under wraps.

The programme is a nicely acted black comedy with a superb lead in Stephen Mangan who can switch between nastiness, farce and pathos with ease. Not for everybody but Never Better brings the subject to the fore without making fun of it. Keith is the fall-guy not the AA and it works well.

Holby City

Holby City cast members Holby City was once seen as Casualty’s poorer relation. It started off by featuring actors from Casualty flitting in and out. However, it is now able to stand on its own two feet and attract actors from Soap Opera such as Brookside , Eastenders and Coronation Street and those from the Bill ( a regular circuit of work for jobbing actors).

Like Casualty, the programme is based in Holby City Hospital in a fictional city in the South West (similar to Bristol). It is a medical drama series which focuses on realistic medical procedures and operations . It looks at all departments in the hospital and not just the Accident and Emergency Department (as Casualty does). The focus is on both the patients and the surgeons, nurses and doctors and the decisions they need to make on medical conditions and on their personal lives. There is also conflict between admin staff and managers (who want to meet various targets ) and the medical staff.

Holby City has just opened up a ward for private patients and this is causing problems as there are surgeons and staff assigned to the private patients, who were formerly with the NHS patients. One of the surgeons was accused of sleeping her way into the top jobs (Jac) and wanting to work on the private ward.

This week we saw Faye (Patsy Kensit) confess to Joseph that she had been questioned by police about her husband’s death. However, he had his own issues to contend with as his brother had been transferred to Holby City (after being unconscious for years). Faye came across Joseph as he was about to inject himself. Later they shared an intimate kiss.

Holby City is fast becoming a favourite soap opera.

Messiah 5

Messiah Marc Warren has taken over from Ken Stott for the leading role in the “Messiah” series. He played DCI Joseph Walker in this second programme of the two-parter (the first took place yesterday).

The story began yesterday by the police finding 4 family members sat around the dinner table, all having had a bloody death. Their hands were tied together with rope and they seemed to be praying. The father ‘s face was totally white as he had been stabbed through the neck. There was some sand on the table. The second victim was found in her car on the car park. Sand was found with a triangle, eye and some Hebrew lettering. The third victim was found hanged to death and was a female dressed in a man’s suit. The murders were all linked in that they were Christians, Jews or Muslims – all three religions being traced back to Abraham.

According to a follower, there were 7 signs from Abrahamic scriptures from the Old and New Testaments of the Bible and from the Qu’ran. The next sign was Violence and Lawlessness and 7 of 9 would be killed. The murderer was thought to have a fundamentalist faith and the victims were representing the various behaviours outlined in the Signs. The Rapture was the last judgement or Armageddon.

The next victims also had a violent death but a woman and her baby survived. The woman was Martha Wallace who’s sister Lea had accused their father of raping her and there was a large trial case. The next sign was “bear false witness” and this turned out to have been Lea (the next victim) who had falsely accused her father of rape (although he did rape Martha).

There were many twists and turns in Messiah 5, which also showed some of the personal life of the police and lawyers. They discovered that there were tapes of events that had taken place in a car park – a row between Lea and her father, a couple making love on a car bonnet , kids breaking into cars and a solicitor Mark Moore was arrested.

DCI Walker’s own girlfriend was a victim representing “Wars and rumours of War” and “Abandonment of faith”. The wrong man had been charged with the murders.

Torchwood

The second series of this Dr. Who spin off has been promoted from BBC3 to BBC2. The end of the first series featured the head of Torchwood, Captain Jack Harkness, almost dying after an encounter with aliens, but then leaving his team when he heard the noise of the TARDIS.

The opening credits said that the new series was punchier, pacier, funnier and it started off well , with Gwen from the team asking a lady who had just crossed the road “Have you seen a blowfish driving a car?” and the lady points and says “Bloody Torchwood”.

For those who have not seen it before, Torchwood was mentioned several times in Dr Who and has evolved into a team of people who are on the lookout for aliens. The programme is set in Cardiff, which is where a rift in the space time continuum has formed. The team consists of Toshiko ( Technician), Owen (a doctor), Gwen (an ex-cop) and Ianto (administrator), led by Captain Jack.

In this opening episode, Jack returned after the blowfish was getting nasty but he had to explain why he disappeared (he went to the Doctor). However, a man dressed in a red military jacket (like the ones worn in the 19th century) dropped a man off a multi-storey car park, headed to a bar and appeared in hologram form to Jack. Jack met him in the bar and they kissed passionately before fighting and ending up in a bar room brawl. Captain John Hart and Captain Jack Harkness knew each other from working in the Time Agency and from being lovers. John is similar in many ways to Jack in that he is multi-sexual.

John has come back apparently to find some radiation cluster canisters (he is actually in search of an Artesian diamond). Jack warns Gwen about him, but she is kissed by John and becomes completely paralysed as they try to find the canisters. John also injures Owen and pushes Jack off a tall building (believing that he has killed him).

When John thinks he is going to find the diamonds , he sees a hologram of the woman that he murdered and a tiny gadget is clamped onto him (with orders to blow up and kill the person that murdered her). However, John cufflinks himself to Gwen and the only option that they have is to find the rift and enter it. In the nick of time, Owen injects John with a mix of blood from the team (thus the DNA is not pure and the gadget can not latch on). When released from the cufflinks, Gwen land John with an almighty punch! A fabulous start to the new series of Torchwood!

Mistresses

This was the second episode of the new drama series from the BBC called “Mistresses”. It follows the story of four 30/40-something female friends who are having or had affairs. It aims to give an alternative view of what it is like to be a mistress and the thought processes and reasons for doing so. It is almost like a British version of the popular “Sex in the City” series.

Katie is a Doctor who had an affair with a married man who died when she was with him. She treats the man’s family and knows them well. Sam Grey is her lover’s son and one of her patients. He has become obsessed with finding his father’s “other woman”. He has a piece of paper with the woman’s handwriting on and during the programme was convinced that Katie was the woman. He tried to trick her into signing his book (to compare the handwriting) and she managed to convince him that she was not the woman. Sam kissed her and asked her out. After deliberating on it all day, Katie turned up for dinner but left quickly.

Siobhan is one part of a married couple who have been trying for some time to have a baby. However even when she is dressed in sexy underwear, all her husband, Hari thought of was baby making. They decided that Hari would provide a sperm sample to see if there were concerns about fertility. Siobhan had slept with a work colleague and was racked with guilt and wondering whether to tell her husband. However her friend convinced her not too. Unfortunately, the test results showed that Hari had very little live sperm and it was unlikely that that Siobhan would get pregnant by him. After being shunned by Hari on a rare afternoon off from work, Siobhan returned to work and resumed the affair with Dominic.

Trudi’s husband had died not too long again as a result of the 9/11 bombings and she was still struggling to come to terms with that and look after her children. She received a million pounds as compensation and met Richard – the father of a girl who attended her daughter’s school. Her friends were suspicious that he appeared on the scene when she received the money. After a disastrous first date, they arranged to go out again but his baby sitter fell ill. Trudi cooked them both a meal at Richard’s house.

Jessica had sworn never to get married but had been helping to organise the civil partnership of two female clients. She had been having an affair with her married work colleague but had become intrigued by lesbianism. One of her female clients made a pass at her.

Mistresses is an interesting programme which portrays the guilt, despair and joy of being “the other woman”.

Fairy Tales - Rapunzel

Charity Wakefield Rapunzel is the first programme from a series of modern twists on fairy tales. She is a British tennis star with long golden hair. She visits Russia (where she was born) and at a press conference says that she will never cut her hair as she is superstitious and thinks it would stop her winning.

Jimmy is a failing tennis player in Russia. At a drugs test, he discovers that he has a lower than normal level of testosterone and his father has the idea of making Jimmy a tennis champion by entering him in the women’s competition of the British Tennis Open. With a short red wig and plenty of make-up, Jimmy calls himself Martina and enters the competition. He is due to meet Rapunzel in the fourth round. Jimmy’s father is in debt and needs “Martina Stojkovic” to get to the quarter finals for the prize money.

Rapunzel has a very strict mother and is found by her in the toilets with a male competitor. Martina pretends that he is actually her boyfriend. She befriends Rapunzel and becomes her tennis training partner. She lives in an extremely large mansion which is patrolled by guards. As in the fairytale, Rapunzel sits by her bedroom window and lets her hair down in the hope that a man will get to the balcony and climb up her hair. She would then fall in love with him. Jimmy decides to give this a try by climbing the drainpipe to the balcony. He asks Rapunzel to let her hair down a bit more, she screams and he runs off, setting off the alarms. She tells Martina (Jimmy has managed to don the wig and get back to bed in the spare room) that the man she saw was a rapist. Rapunzel asks to sleep in Martina’s bid and admits that she wishes Martina were a man. The pair kiss and Rapunzel later admits she has feelings for Martina. Unfortunately, a photograph is taken by one of the commentators and Rapunzel’s mother is blackmailed.

Rapunzel’s mother grabs hold of her hair in a fight and Rapunzel cuts it to get free. After the scandal hits the press, Rapunzel and Martina play the 4th round tennis match. Rapunzel does not play her best tennis and allows Martina to win. At the interview after the match, Jimmy reveals that he is a man and receives an on-air punch from Rapunzel. There are further revelations when Jimmy’s rfther says that he was neither kidnapped nor heavy in debt.

The story ends 12 months later, with Jimmy at the top of his game. Rapunzel visits him and he admits that he is in love with her. All good fairytales have a happy ending.

Honest

Honest The first episode of the new drama series aired on ITV tonight. Honest is the story of the Carter family who are anything but honest and are used to living a life of crime. Amanda Redman as Lindsay Carter – mother to twins Taylor and Vincent (Vin), Kacie and Lianna .

The programme starts with Vincent Carter and his friend breaking into a Chinese house. Little did they know that the female resident was a karate expert and she practiced her moves on Vin (who was badly beaten). They had burgled Mr Hong and taken a family heirloom. Unfortunately, Vin had left his balaclava at those house, complete with nametag. Mr Hong had evidence for the police and was also well connected with the Triads. Mr Hong wanted the sculpture back but unfortunately Vin had sold it. When he got it back, he managed to drop it!

It is an important day for the Carters. Father Mack was up in court for stealing a car which was used as a getaway vehicle for a bank job. He was sentenced to 4 years in jail, It was also the day of Taylor’s graduation from law school. He was thought to be the only straight member of the family, but had lied at his interview. When told that the law firm were trying to increase their quota of minorities, he said that he was a Muslim.

Younger daughter Lianna had not been to school some time as she wanted to learn about the film business. She was blackmailing her deputy head mistress who had slept with her brother Taylor when he was 16. She had photographic evidence and threatened to send this to the Board of Governors unless she got what she wanted.

Kacie had delusions of being a model and thought she was the “next Naomi Campbell” only whiter. In need of money for promotion, she went to the Job Centre and asked for an advance. She handed over her portfolio to the official who was found photocopying and distributing her photos. She threw a stapler at him and was accused of assault.

Grandad’s house had burned down and went to live with the Carters. He had been trying to dispose of his house for a while and also tried to flood it!

After hearing Mack’s sentence, Lindsay decided that all of the family would go straight and earn their money. Lianna was sent back to school, Kacie started working in the local fish and chip shop and Vin had to do odd jobs for the Hongs. Honest has made a good start and looks to be an interesting series.

Hetty Wainthropp Investigates

Patricia Routledge is perhaps better known as the snobbish and insufferable Hyacinth Bucket from “Keeping Up Appearances”. In Hetty Wainthropp Investigates , she stars as Hetty, a retired Lancastrian housewife, who with assistant Geoffrey (played by a young Dominic Monaghan) has a detective agency. The series was made between 1996 and 1998 and has been repeated on the BBC over the Christmas period.

In this episode, Hetty is called upon to investigate various happenings on a housing estate. The neighbours seem to be terrorised by a gang but the identity is being kept quiet. Hetty pretends to be the sister-in-law of one of the residents and joins the quilting circle in order to hear the latest gossip. She adopts a not very convincing Irish accent and can not sew very well. She uncovers the fact that the culprits drive a white van but always get away with their crimes.

Geoffrey attempts to put up a shed for his “aunty” with a local boy (played by Coronation Street’s Tyrone – Alan Halsall). The boy has seen the gang setting fire to various properties but has been scared to come forward. Geoffrey tries to get friendly with the girl in the chipshop but is taken off in the white van and beaten up. Eventually the culprit is caught, but the programme keeps you guessing as to how Hetty manages to upstage the Police.

Hetty Wainthropp Investigates can be described as a comedy crime thriller and ran for 4 series.

Sense and Sensibility

Period drama is something that the BBC does best and Sense and Sensibility is a fine example of that. The production is lavish and adapted by Andrew Davies, of Bleak House and Pride and Prejudice. The drama is based on the book by Jane Austen and follows the Dashwood family and the lives and loves of the two of the three girls – sensible Elinor and romantic Marianne. There is an all star cast featuring Janet McTeer David Morrissey and Mark Williams.

Episode 1 of 3 starts with the death of Mr Dashwood , and Mrs Dashwood and her three daughters having to find somewhere else to live. The girls are used to a privileged lifestyle but all of that is at risk as they have no claim on the estate, which their half-brother John inherits. They move to Devonshire and Elinor is distraught as she is forced to leave her love – Edward Ferrars . However, Mrs Ferrars does not consider Elinor to be a suitable match for her son.

In Devonshire, Marianne becomes the object of Colonel Brandon’s affections (Morrissey) but there is quite an age gap as she is 15 and he is 35 (closer to her mother’s age). She becomes attracted to handsome Mr. Willoughby who rescues her when she sprains her ankle whilst out walking. Willoughby and Brandon meet when both are visiting Marianne and it is obvious that there is some history between them. Future episodes will focus on the love affairs and heartbreaks of the two older Dashwood girls (played by Emma Thompson and Kate Winslet in the award winning film version of Sense and Sensibility).

Dr. Who Christmas Special

Kylie and The Doctor Christmas is not Christmas without something good to watch on the television and Dr. Who never fails to deliver.
This special one-hour episode of Dr. Who was called “Voyage of the Dammed” and started with the Titanic going through the TARDIS and Dr Who exclaiming “What!!!?” The programme had a number of famous faces including Geoffrey Palmer, Kylie Minogue, George Costigan and Bernard Cribbins.

As he enters the Titanic, the Doctor comes to terms with strange Robot Angels and a red spikey faced dwarf named Bannakaffalatta (who is a cyborg). The Titanic is actually not a ship on the sea but is a space ship in orbit around the Earth (a level 5 planet). Titanic is part of Max Capricorn Cruiseliners. One of the Robots -The Heavenly Host - tells Dr. Who that the purpose of the cruise is to examine primitive cultures from Planet Sto. The Robots have a habit of going on the blink. – one has almost strangled a passenger whilst fixing her necklace.

Kylie Minogue plays Astrid, a put-upon waitress who becomes the Doctor’s side-kick and provides some love interest.

Mr Copper, a (false) Historian tells the guests they intend to visit that UK, which is ruled over by Good King Wenceslas; that human beings worship the Great God Santa and his wife Mary; and that every Christmas Eve, people of the UK go to war with Turkey and then eat the people of Turkey (like savages). A team visit the UK on Christmas Eve to find it is empty. London at Christmas is not thought to be safe as a Christmas Star electrocuted last year and there were space ships the year before.

They get back to the Titanic because of power fluctuations. Meteoroids are heading towards them and there is no protective shield in place. When asked whether the shielding has been checked, one of the Robot Angels quips “Information – you are all going to die!”

The ship becomes bombarded with meteoroids and has huge holes in it. Unfortunately, the TARDIS has left the Titanic and has locked onto the orbit of the Earth, and the Robot Angels are intent on killing people. There are reminders of the film, The Poseidon Adventure as some of the passengers, led by the Doctor climb to the top of the ship and use a defunct Robot Angel , whilst others try to kill them by taking off their halos and throwing them like deadly frisbees. Bannakaffalatta and his fuel supply help to save the day.

When faced with a number of Robot Angels, the Doctor says he wants to ask 3 questions and wastes two of them before proclaiming himself a stowaway (and thus not able to be killed). He then says “Take me to your leader” – one of many comedic moments in the programme. The Doctor meets Max who consists of a human head wired up to a cyborg life support system. The Titanic has just a small amount of energy left to stop it from crashing into the Earth, but Max Capricorn is intent on destroying it. Astrid gets into a fork lift trick and aims to push Max in to the gaping hole of the ship – which she does.

With Max dead , the Host Robots consider the Doctor to be their superior and transport him to the bridge of the Titanic – Superman style. However, it looks like the Titanic is on a collision course for Buckingham Palace and the Queen and corgis are seen leaving. With the Doctor at the wheel, the ship misses the Palace . He manages to bring Astrid back but just as set of atoms and kisses her so that she can travel forever, like fairy dust. The Doctor takes Mr Copper down to the UK

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