Bill Bailey’s Remarkable Guide To The Orchestra Review: In Tune
November 20, 2009 by admin
Filed under Film Reviews, News
BILL BAILEY’S REMARKABLE GUIDE TO THE ORCHESTRA: On general DVD release across the UK from Monday 23rd November 2009
We’re not sure what Bill Bailey fans had in mind when they sat down in Royal Albert Hall for his “Remarkable Guide to the Orchestra.”
Alongside the BBC Concert Orchestra and Academy Award-winning conductor Anne Dudley, Bailey spends the entire program proffering his melodic wisdom onto us common folk.
The surrealist comedian turns didactic musician over the course of one-and-a-half hours. At least he still manages to make us laugh.
The good news is, this program still retains the essence of Bill Bailey: cocknified classics and pop-inspired parodies backed by piano, guitar, flute, and even that strange electronic theremin take form in a spoof on Chris de Burgh, a song about racial harmony called “Let’s Hear It For The Zebra,” and Read More…
Anne Hathaway To Play Spider-Man 4 Villain? (WTF!)
As news stories go, this is a pretty tenuous one, but what it might lack in credibility, it more than makes up for in hilarity.
Apparently Anne Hathaway – the annoying woman from the eye-gougingly bad Princess Diaries series – is being lined up for the role of Spider-Man 4 villain, Black Cat.
Although, just how a woman who is afraid of Meryl Streep is going to intimidate Spidey is open for debate – but then we suppose Tobey Maguire is no John McClane himself.
Julia Stiles, Rachel McAdams and Romola Garai have all been linked to the project in recent weeks, but the latter two have ruled out appearing in the film.
We don’t blame them – this is shaping up to be the campest superhero flick since Bananaman.
Twilight New Moon: Pattinson Felt “Goofy” Getting Naked
If Robert Pattinson feels weird getting naked in front of people, then what chance do the rest of us ugly fools stand?
The star of Twilight New Moon told Parade magazine that the moment of nudeness also underlined the responsibility he feels towards fans of the series.
“I felt pretty goofy stepping out into the sunlight in front of 2,000 people in a town square, ripping my clothes off. I was essentially doing a striptease.”
“But here’s the irony, it was also one of the moments where I’ve really felt closest to people’s emotional attachment to Edward,” he said.
“There were so many extras in that scene who were Twilight fans who had flown in just to be a part of it.”
“It was a moment where I’ve felt the whole weight of anticipation, and I guess responsibility as well, of being Edward, for all the people who were kind of so obsessed with the stories. It was quite uplifting and it was also very nervewracking.”
Pattinson has also promised that the new film includes “a lot of nipple shots”.
Excellent news.
We’ve seen New Moon! Check out the OTB review….
Peter Jackson Told “Make Lovely Bones More Violent”
Peter Jackson directs a scene for Lovely Bones
But Peter Jackson revealed that he was told to go back to the drawing board by test screening audiences after they told him that various death scenes in his new flick Lovely Bones, just weren’t violent enough.
The film is based on Alice Sebold’s harrowing bestseller about how a murdered 14-year-old girl watches from heaven as her grieving family attempt to ensnare her killer.
Jackson told Reuters that he was forced to return to the editing room to “basically add more violence and suffering. The audience wanted far more violence, they just weren’t satisfied.”
The svelte director then explained that “we got a lot of people telling us that they were disappointed with one death scene, as they wanted to see the character in agony and suffer a lot more.”
If he will insist on test screening his films in psychiatric prisons, then he has to expect these kinds of comments…
47 Ronin To Be Cross Between LOTR and Gladiator (Wow)
Universal’s 18th Century samurai epic starring Keanu Reeves has been in the pipeline for nearly a year – but things should finally start to get moving now as the studio have finally found themselves a director.
Debutant Carl Erik Rinsch will be taking charge of 47 Ronin and screen-writer Chris Morgan (Wanted), has already promised Lord of The Rings-type high fantasy and Galdiator-type battle scenes.
It already sounds amazing.
As you have probably picked up from countless previous films, Ronin are masterless samurai, and the story of the 47 Ronin – one of Japan’s key national legends – concerns the vengeance of the titular group after their feudal lord is forced to commit ritual suicide, following an assault on a corrupt court official.
Rinsch has previously helmed some impressive adverts for BMW and Mercedes, but it’s unusual for a director with no previous feature films under his belt to be given such a large project.
But then he is dating Ridley Scott’s daughter…
Twilight New Moon: “Emotions Help On-Set Chemistry” Says Stewart
Kristen Stewart (we refuse to call her KStew) has revealed that having a close personal relationship with fellow stars helps her work.
Well that’s quite handy…
Speaking at the press conference for New Moon, the actress explained that getting involved with her co-stars had augmented her performance no end.
“Any good relationship that I’ve ever had with an actor has been so emotional and personal. If you don’t have that then you’re just lying.”
“I have that with Taylor Lautner and everybody that I’ve ever worked with that I’ve ever gotten something from, and you need that.”
“It doesn’t mess with you because you’re better friends with someone on set and you need to be playing different characters.”
She added: “You’re just on a higher level of getting each another, so you’re more comfortable and thus more able to give a more honest performance.”
Spider-Man To Become A Baby-Daddy?
He may have a relationship with Mary-Jane that makes other superhero couples look positively harmonious, but Peter Parker seems set to become a daddy in the latest Spider-Man sequel.
According to Spolier TV, a casting notice has asked for a toddler to play a two year-old with “red hair” and an “engaging personality” in Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man 4.
The fact the casting has called for a ginger child has prompted strong speculation that the sprog in question will be the offspring of Peter Parker and girlfriend ‘MJ’ Watson.
Either that or Spidey will be up against the most ridiculous villain he has ever faced.
Spider-Man 4, starring Tobey Maguire and Kirsten Dunst, will begin production next year for a May 2011 release.
Twilight New Moon: “I Care That Fans Care” Says Stewart
After kicking-off at a group of reporters last week, Kristen Stewart (or KStew to an army of Twilight fans) has said how much she cares about the importance of the movie to fans.
The actress, who plays Bella in the series, told Parade that people had misunderstood her previous comments at the end of filming on New Moon.
At the time she said: “If you make movies and you don’t care about the people who watch, then you probably just want to be rich and famous.”
After some advice from her PR team, last night she changed her position somewhat.
“The fact that these movies are important to so many people makes me so happy. I care that they care.”
“I said at Comic-Con that my favourite moment on New Moon was when we wrapped. People took it the wrong way,” she explained,
“It wasn’t like I was glad it was over, it was just such a memorable moment for me because I literally fell apart. I went like, ‘Aaagh’. I almost couldn’t handle it.”
Twilight fan taken to hospital after scrap over last Rob Pattinson poster!
Leona Lewis To Sing Avatar Theme Song (Start Packing Your Ear Muffs)
The lung-bursting movie warbler is back.
Celine Dion may have tried her darndest to kill it off with the ear-bleeding Titanic tune, but Leona Lewis is intent on resurrecting the moneyspinner by agreeing to sign for the closing song of Avatar.
I See You (Theme From Avatar) will blast out in THX Surround Sound as punters are leaving the cinema after watching James Cameron’s 3D sci-fi epic.
Anyone hoping that it might contain just a smidgen of artistic integrity should start packing their ear-muffs with their tickets now.
It has been announced that James Horner is writing the song. That is, the man who wrote My Heart Will Go On (Even If The Audience Loses The Will To Live).
With Adam Lambert’s similarly grandiose Time For Miracles providing an aural assault along with 2012’s visual one, it looks like the uber-soundtrack is here to stay.
Twilight New Moon: R-Patz Hysteria Causes Fan Injury
You know it’s bad when there’s a name for them.
“The Robert Pattinson fans, also known as the Robsessed, are the most hardcore of fanatics,” a spokesman for the new DVD Robsessed said after a young fan was hospitalised on Sunday night following a brutal tiff.
Free posters were distributed to the 300 Twi-hards who had won tickets to the world fan premiere of the Robsessed DVD at the Prince Charles Cinema in Leicester Square. But apparently there was not enough for everyone.
“A massive fight broke out between two girls over the last poster,” recalls Precious Acabousi, a 19-year-old attendee. “There was a lot of pushing and shoving. Everyone was crowding around them.”
The unfortunate fan was allegedly rushed to the hospital with a twisted arm. As for the poster— “It had been ripped in two.”
Jeez – how long until the hysteria escalates to fatality level?
